I spy with my little eye...

5 flights, 5 cities and a week and a half later, and my head is full of new sights that are outside of the ordinary for me these days.

I saw.....
-A straight-looking guy wearing a skirt. It wasn't a kilt but a bonafide skirt made of khaki, with pleats and cargo pockets.
-A mail truck stopped for gas. I've never seen one pumping gas before. It was weird.

-Some dear old friends in Knoxville, Louisville, Birmingham and Pensacola. It was so good to catch up with them and hear how God is moving in their lives.

At my lingerie shower at home with the girls! My t-shirt said "Bride!"

Eating dinner and catching up with Alyssa from Union at Cheesecake Factory in Louisville.

With two of my old Union roomies - Katie and Merry - waiting to see Jenn get married!

-One of my dear friends (and bridesmaids!) get married. She looked gorgeous, the wedding was so sweet with tears galore, and it was lovely to spend time with her and see her make her marriage vows before God and friends.

Sweet Jenn - one of my bridesmaids and dear friends.

-My entire toiletries bag covered in baby powder. Darn unclosed lid.
-A big resolution for a Great Commission Task force get passed at the Southern Baptist Convention.

All in all, a good week, although one that has left me exhausted. I'm glad to be home for a few days before heading out again to SC to see my fiance, my family, and my furry friend - Ben! Looking forward to a few nights alone and a few days with loved ones.

Ready or not....

We picked a date. We picked a place. We picked bridesmaids dresses. We discussed lots of other things. All in all? It was a great, productive weekend.

Now, my night entails taking out the trash, watering the plants, feeding the turtles, showering, and finishing packing so I can roll out bright and early in the morning for Louisville.

Crazy week, here I come!

Double time!

Did any of you ever do the Billy Blanks Tae Bo videos? I liked them until Billy boy said, "Double time!" and suddenly everyone on screen kicked it up a notch and the workout proceeded to kick my butt.

Billy Blank's "double time" Tae Bo = my life.

Starting tomorrow, I will begin the 6 week marathon known as "summer" for me. It looks like this:
-M'ville for wedding planning - including picking a site, date, bridesmaids' dresses, stationary style and a then having my lingerie shower!
-Home in Raleigh for a night before jet-setting to Louisville, Birmingham and Pensacola
-Back in my humble abode for 4 nights before going to Charleston for July 4th festivities with my fiance and family - a marathon weekend with people flying in to meet A (but mostly to see the city)
-Home for a week or so, with my best friend coming in for a final visit before she spends her fall volunteering in Latin America
-Two and a half weeks in Thailand.
-The end. I will crash be crashing at this point.

Is it worth mentioning my first weekend at home will hold engagement photos and a friend's wedding? Maybe I said "The end" prematurely.

Looking back at it - I think Tae Bo would be a breeze compared to my schedule.

Bring it on, Billy. Bring. it. on.

"At least you have the dress"

Over the last week, I have become increasingly overwhelmed at the thought of the tasks that lie ahead of us. We need to book a venue, find a date, do engagement pictures, finalize our guest list, pick out bridesmaid dresses, decide on a caterer, design our stationary, send out invitations....etc., etc. And that's all in the next couple of weeks. It's all slightly stress-inducing.

A is being so sweet in urging me to not be stressed and to remember the important thing: Regardless of what the wedding looks like, at the end of the day, we'll be married. I can't wait for that moment.

In the meantime, as I am discussing these "to-dos" with bridesmaids, my mom and my photographer, the phrase "At least you have your dress" keeps coming out of their mouths.

I admit - it is surprising I found it so quickly and effortlessly. I was the girl who planned weekend getaways to Nashville and Atlanta to go shopping for my prom dresses so that I would have a Wa-BAM Dress that no on else had. (What's a Wa-BAM Dress, you ask? It's one that when you walk into a room, everyone stops and says "Wa-BAM, you look good." Irony of ironies, my Atlanta trip for senior year prom yielded me a beautiful dress....which happened to be the exact same one my best friend had bought at home. Oh well, I guess we both looked good!)

So, I do find it interesting that on the day that everyone says "is all about me" I was less than concerned with finding a dress that made everyone drool, as long as my love thinks I look beautiful. I take it as a sign of maturity - I no longer have that inner drive for attention that I once had. I think it's the knowledge that I don't want the attention at our wedding to be all about me - I want it to be on the Lord.

So as I remind myself that the day isn't about me, and it's not even all about us as a couple, I remember that it is about Christ Jesus and it is a celebration of His love for His bride - the church. When I focus on that, the concerns about guest list size, location, stationary color, bridesmaid dress cut...it all becomes infinitely less important. If people come and the food is cold and the music is lame and it rains on our beautiful outdoor ceremony, will God still be glorified? I hope so. That's our goal.

Pain

I don't have any answers to the problem of pain. The only thing I know is that the world is a painful place and life is a painful thing to live through.

I have lately been overwhelmed with the realization of how many problems people are dealing with, how much pain is in their hearts. Broken relationships, broken dreams, broken bones, unmet expectations, hurtful words and actions...It all strikes at the core of our beings. I think the reason these things are so painful is because we were created for more. We were created to have full, perfect relationships with our loving Heavenly Father and with one another. We were created to be in perfect harmony with all that God had fashioned, but that is no longer the world we live in.

Instead, we struggle against the prince of darkness, who causes pain and heartache and no way to out. I praise God that he has fought and defeated the enemy, although we have yet to fully see the effects of it in this life. Even in the midst of deep heartache, God is worthy to be praised, for he has provided a way out from pain. He promises no more death, or crying, or hurting. He promises comfort and peace everlasting.

"In my darkest hour, that's where I found true love. Jesus lifted me from the dead of night, and he'll never give me up. I'm his beloved and he is mine. Nothing can separate us, no space, no time, no death, no life, no person, no power, so strong is the love of my heavenly Father."

Come quickly, Lord. Heal the broken hearts of your people.