I'm a graduate!

Saturday I graduated from Union University, after 4 wonderful years. I had a great weekend with my parents and Brian, and my aunt and uncle. It was beautiful weather all weekend, so it made the outside-hanging out much more enjoyable!

Since Saturday night, when I walked across the stage and received my diploma, I have been feeling like everything is a little surreal and reminiscent of this time 4 years ago. Once again, I stand on the edge. I know and love what is behind me, but I can't go back. I don't know what lies ahead, but I am ready to jump into it!

I have been trying to unpack and get settled back into Maryville (aka, SLOW) life since I got home last night. It's been a good day, but I need to face reality tomorrow. That means, sending out job applications, resumes, clips, etc. in hopes of landing a "career" type job. Also, I need to be calling River Rat to see if they'll take me back for a few weeks this summer :) That'd be dandy, so I'd have some income!

I'm still looking at Denver, DC and Nashville. I am so torn about Nashville. On one hand, I don't want to move there, because I feel like it is so safe and not a challenge for me. Denver seems so exciting and like such an amazing growing experience. However, my family is in Maryville, and I don't know that I want to move 20 hours away. Also, I probably have the best chance of getting a Nashville job over anything else. So....we shall see I guess. If you read this, I ask for your prayers. I need discernment over where the Lord wants me to be, and what I ought to be doing.

Less than a week....

It's Monday night, and I graduate (Lord willing) on Saturday. I cannot believe it is this close. I have had a wonderful couple of days of "finals week" as i have not been studying much, but rather playing, laying out, hanging out with Ben and friends, and enjoying my last days at Union.

I am growing increasingly sad to leave this place. It has been my home, my domain, my stomping grounds, whatever for four years, and after Saturday, I don't know if I will ever come back.

The devil has been working hard to make me angry and ready to get out, so that I will forget to cherish all of the great memories I made here. Last week, my computer crashed before I had 3 papers due, and I lost part of a magaine article I had written 5 minutes before it was due. So, I panicked, but the Lord sustained me, made everything OK, and gave me peace.

Now I am on a bittersweet journey through these last few days of my life here. I cried in church on Sunday when we sang "You are God alone. Before time began, you were on your throne. You are God alone" because I know those words are true, but I am finding it hard to always trust His plan and rest in His sovereignity. I know He will bring about good things for me, but its so hard to live that, when I know I am leaving one of the best times of my life.

I am excited about the next phase though, whatever that may be. A move to Denver perhaps, a new job, a new apartment, quality time with Ben, and meeting new people! I am looking forward to seeing my family on Friday and getting home to rest and enjoy the simple pleasures of life at home in Maryville for a few weeks. Aftet that, who knows where I'll be or what I'll be doing? I sure don't!

Two weeks till graduation

It's amazing how much can change in a week. Really, it's amazing how much can change in a day. On Monday, after posting my last entry, I had a talk with my roommate.

Jenn was the one I was supposed to be living with in Nashville after graduation. We had both been job hunting there, and had gone to look at apartments together. I was not really any more excited to move to Nashville after looking at apartments than I was after Spring Break, when I first realized I don't really want to be living in Nashville right now. Actually, Nashville isn't terrible, nor is it completely crossed off, but it definately hasn't been my first choice in a while.

More than anything, I have been feeling reluctant about Nashville, but tied to Jenn, because I would be a crummy friend if I bailed now, and I knew she didn't want to move there alone.

Anyways, we talked Monday, and she told me she did not have a peace about Nashville, and she was moving home instead. The Lord used her reluctance to free me from a commitment I no longer wanted to keep! Praise the Lord. I was free to do what I wanted!

Since Monday, I have checked out jobs in Denver (choice #1) as well as D.C. (choice #2, but the cost of living is SO high). I will begin sending out my resume as soon as possible, and see what doors the Lord opens up.

I am trusting Him to provide a job, an apartment, and a roomie-even though I don't know a soul in either city! He is faithful, and He will provide, if I will only wait on Him!

"...See I set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to His voice, and hold fast to Him." ~Deuteronomy 30:19-20.