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Friday, April 4, 2008


I was blog cruising and happened upon a funny video that was a clip from Good Morning America. This woman (Anita Renfroe) has come to apparent fame for her analysis of purses and what they say about a woman. She seriously hits the nail on the head, over and over again. That sucker is nailed down when she's done!

In the video, they mention that the average woman has 10 purses, weighing an average weight of 3.4 pounds each, carrying an average of 67 items. I would have to admit several things in relation to this:

- I have 10 purses, including the current one I carry. The other 9 sit waiting in my closet, and I have more at home that I guess I left there, for whatever reason. This is after I sold about 12 at a garage sale before moving to my apartment. I have calmed down a bit, but for a while there, I was a purse-aholic. As a wise friend of mine once said, "I love accessories. No matter how fat you get, they still work for you."

- My current purse, which I have (regretfully/joyfully) stuck with for about a year and a half weighs 6.5 pounds on a normal, full day. It is large, I'll grant that. However, I once heard that having large accessories makes one appear smaller. For a girl of 5'8'', this may explain why I drive a big SUV, am obsessed with getting a Great Dane someday, and adore my large bag.

- I counted, and I have 47 items in my bag right now. (Notice I am now calling it a bag. I just remembered a friend recently told me "bag" or "handbag" was the proper term, and "purse" is no longer haute couture. My bad.) So, while I am planning on downsizing in the future, I currently have 47 items in my bag. That is 20 less than the national average. Hurrah! However, I ought to mention that number does not include how many things are hidden inside little pouches (example, my lip gloss pouch was counted as 1, while it has about 8 tubes of stuff inside.)

Here's a general rundown. Keep in mind, this list is not complete, as a woman's purse is "sacred" and not meant to be revealed to all!

1) 1 pair of reading glasses: Rarely used.
2) One wallet with coupons and old cards (gift, credit, etc.) Comes equipped with a mirror.
3) The top piece of my camera. My camera is usually in here, but not today. This piece doesn't stay on anymore.
4) A jump drive, for storing all my important, top-secret documents.
5) My lip gloss pouch. Inside it has 7 tubes of lipgloss/chapstick/lipstick. Also, a random handgun keychain.
6) Tubes of lipstick, chapstick and softlips that wouldn't fit into the pouch.
7) Raspberry Lemonade mix. Leftover from Guatemala 2 years ago, I think...
8) Some sucky-doesn't-really-moisturize-lotion. Also a remnant of Guatemala!
9) Some Kleenex travel tissues. Those came in very handy last week on a hike in the woods....
10) 2 paper clips of differing sizes
11) Three bobby pins (Left over from some formal, no doubt!)
12) Two notepads with months-old grocery lists
13) A comb I used a lot this summer when I drove to work with wet hair.
14) Some green tea pills left over from a "weight loss" kick a year or so ago.
15) A broken pair of earrings.
16) Travel-size Germ-X. Repeated use of this could explain the need for crappy lotion (see #8)
17) An almost-empty bottle of Excedrin extra strength. I'm going to need a refill ASAP.
18) A ton of old receipts that will never be stored or used in any useful way.
19) Lots of old gum/mint wrappers (don't worry, no old gum wrapped in them!)
20) 3 Highlighters - 2 yellow ones, and a green for the days I want to mix things up a bit. Did I mention I rarely ever use highlighters at all?
21) Lots of pens in various stages of functionality.
22) An old, dried-up Tide To Go pen. I just found the lid and for whatever reason, put it back into my bag.
22) Tanning goggles, minus the face strap. I don't even know when I last went tanning.
22) My Vera Bradley wallet. Inside: Credit/debit cards, business cards, driver's license, ID card, and occasionally, cash. Today is one such lucky day.
22) Set of spare keys/office keys.
23) A random floater key for something at Union. Considering it is not my dorm key, I am guessing it was to the newspaper office or the photo house.
24) A random key to a lock. Maybe from when I locked my bike up to the stairs at UU??
25) Car and apartment keys.
26) Harris Teeter VIC card that is free-floating.
27) My hot-pink, "fashion" Bible, as my boss calls it. It has more stuff stuck in the pages, but we won't go there.
28) An umbrella. It has come in VERY handy lately! People bash the big bag, but look who stays dry during an unexpected thunderstorm. That's right....Me. So there.
29) Instructions for a video game I got from Adam for Christmas.
30) The face strap for the tanning goggles. Maybe I should attach the two.
31) Leftover coupons from Ben's obedience school days.
32) A list of people to contact to start an ESL ministry.
33) 3 checkbooks....Odd, considering I only have 2 accounts!
34) My new, tres chic Amanda Bynes sunglasses. Love 'em.

So, there's the (incomplete) list. A stranger recently commented that I could fit a small child in my bag. No sir, just a small dog. Been there, done that.

Based on this analysis of my bag, I would say I am option #1, as presented by Ms. Renfroe: "More is more better." I like to be prepared for whatever comes.

Watch the video and let me know which type you are!


Amanda said...

Wow! I'm go glad that you have something to keep you occupied at work further more I can't believe I just read everything that's in your bag. I do prefer the name bag to purse. ALSO! Can I just say I'm excited that I have someone to share The Rocket Summer with!! I didn't know you liked him. super exciting. Maybe you should clean our your bag too, hopefully you did while you were pulling things out.

Brian said...

You forgot to mention that pink snub nose .357 pistol Uncle Donald gave you for graduation (or did you lose the darn thing already?!?). That thing is smokin' in every sense of the word gurl!